“Ron Lechler is the nicest piece of shit I’ve ever met.”
“Ron knows his sensibilities and never strays from them and he doesn’t give a damn if you don’t like it.”
“Ron has a big wang.”
“Ron is one of a kind, thankfully.”
“Ron Lechler is a man of great sagacity and penetrating wit. If it wasn’t for him I would have never looked up the definition for sagacity.”
“Ron Lechler is great in small doses.”
“Ron Lechler once kissed me on the lips. He said it was a joke, but he really did it to know what pussy tastes like.”
“Ron Lechler will grow on you, like a cyst.”
“Ron? I’ve been saying Rob this whole time.”
“To humanize Hiter, people like to bring up that he loved dogs. In the future, to humanize Ron Lechler, people will bring up the fact that he loved Hitler.”
“I love Ron Lechler almost as much as he loves himself.”
“Ron Lechler is like the Tony Romo of being hyper aware that he’s a privileged white dude. I mean, statistically he’s way better at it than most of his peers but he’s not the best or anything.”
“Ron Lechler may not look good in a bathing suit, but you can believe his personality does.”
“Ron Lechler once tried to pay me $100 to watch him suck a guy’s dick. He was paying the other guy $125.”
“Ron Lechler makes me feel less alone.”
“Ron Lechler makes me feel stupid and loved at the same time. Like a well educated dad who still makes time for me, even though I know he’s busy eating pussy.”
“I actually don’t mind Ron Lechler.”
“Ron Lechler is the best export from Michigan since Kid Rock!”
“Ron Lechler may be bad at every art form, but what he lacks in talent, he makes up for in sucking men’s penises at an abandoned 7/11.”
